The struggle of being too skinny.

Being too skinny is really not that good.

Trust me!

Please don't think that I am showing off because I am writing this. But, I really hope you can understand the struggle of being too skinny sometimes.

To be honest, so many people are jealous of me that no matter how much I eat, I am still this skinny. I've been fat too. Okay, not fat just a bit meaty, two to three years back. When I was studying in Penang, I am getting more and more meaty. That tummy, I seriously hate that. :< No doubt, Penang has too many good food that got me can't stop eating. I know that Ipoh is a food paradise too, but I just don't know why when I get back here I just lose weight consistently. From the fattest time I was 45kg to 36kg. In 9 months time, I have lose 9kg. I can't gain it back now, my weight is always around 36 to 38.5 /39 kg. Cannot hit the 40+ on the weight scale anymore. Even if I go eat McDonald's at 1am or always eating dessert, it just doesn't work. 

Jealous? Feeling how can I not being fat at all? Please, don't! I even has suspected myself have some disease or something that I went for blood test. Nothing special, perhaps it's just in my DNA. My sister is skinny like me too, so it's probably in the DNA.

If you've known me for about 5 years or more, you must have seen how much I've changed. If you're not, let me show you then. 

October 2014

Can you see how chubby I was? That arm thou. So meaty. 

And look at the below pictures: 

CNY 2015

January 2016

People always telling me that I look so much better if I can gain back some weight. I am trying, guys. Trust me I am really trying but I just didn't able to. 

There are actually many problems of being too skinny. Below is some of the problems I always meet. 

1. Can't find perfectly fit shirt, especially shorts & pants. 

Even if I buy the smallest size, it might not fit too. People always thought that it must be easy for me to buy shirt. Actually not. When I went to Bangkok during CNY this year, I bought a lot of shirt but half of it need to be tailored so that it will fit perfectly. Spend even more money on it. 

2. Always need to punch extra holes on belt or watch. 

I can never buy G-Shock, not even Baby-G cause it always look huge on my hand. (I always wanted to buy a Baby-G) *saddddddd

3. Can't buy ring because that standard size is really not standard for me. 

I am always a fans of accessories, I like to buy fancy ring but it just doesn't fit for me. 

4. Relatives & friends are always asking you: Did you lose weight again? 

I get so frustrated whenever my relatives or friends asking me this question even if they just saw me a week ago. I was like, Hey you just saw me last week. Do you think I can lose so much weight in one week? I just look like this kays. 

5. Hands and legs just look like skeleton. 

Because they just look like skeleton wrapped with skin, not meat. Feel like it will be broken at anytime. I will just fly away if the wind is too strong. I can't even buy nice shoes, cause skeleton doesn't look good in certain shoes. (& because my feet are super small, size 3)

6. UNDERWEIGHT 

I have been hearing this term in my whole life. I will never get the qualification to donate blood because I will feel dizzy even if I am just going for blood test. That small amount of blood made me feel dizzy. @@ 

So yea, being too skinny is really not that good guys. Don't be jealous of me. I hope I can gain some weight so I won't look like skeleton. 

Till then, 

xx 

❄