Exactly three months ago, my relationship ended.
It has been three months. It's not a very long period, it's not short either.
I have COMPLETELY let go of this relationship, I think.
I don't know how I did it. I just did. I used to think that I might take forever to let go of this relationship as I have loved so hard, so deep for this person. However I did it in a shorter time I thought I need.
A friend told me, "You are so strong! How can you did that?"
I seriously got no idea.
I realize I let him go, when I don't think about him anymore. When I am in sorrow or joy, he's no longer the person that comes to my mind first anymore.
I realize I let him go, when I don't feel anything when I saw his name pop-up in my notifications bar.
I realize I let him go, when I don't feel pain when I talk about him.
I realize I let him go, when his title changed from "my boyfriend" to "my ex".
If you ask me how, here are my ways of moving on:
1. Spend more time on yourself & Focus on other things instead of thinking about him/her.
* I am learning Gu Zheng 古筝 (I have just started a year, FYI). So I spend more time to practice. When I feel bad, I go practice. It actually works to calm my mind everytime I play it.
* Read. I read novel, I read a lot. I can sit there whole day just reading. Don't be surprised, I love reading since high school and people thought I am the outgoing girl who don't spend time reading.
* Watch drama. Find some series to watch. Watch some heart breaking Korean dramas and cry your heart out if you want. You can find the situation same as yours and cry until your tears dried out, then you will not cry anymore. lol.
2. Go out & Know new people.
Go out with friends, don't stuck yourself at house and keep thinking about the memories. Get out and know new people. I don't mean to ask you to know someone and get into a new relationship (you can if you want but it's not a good idea). Know someone new, you'll find something interesting out there. Expand your circle, your life is not just around one person.
3. Talk about it until it doesn't hurt anymore.
Some people will feel it's not comfortable to tell people about all your heartbreaks stories. Then perhaps you can find someone you trust and talk to him/her all about it. First time you talk about it, you might cry, you might feel very pain about it. Talk about it for the second, third or forth time, you can still cry. Talk and cry until you don't feel the pain anymore. When it doesn't hurt anymore, I think you are okay already.
4. Travel.
If your financial allows, go for a trip, near or far. Go for a trip, calm your mind. Have fun and enjoy the trip. The world out there have so many things for you to explore, don't waste your time ponder over your ex and your failed relationship.
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| Sunflower Sea @ Hokkaido. |
I don't know if it works for everyone but that's the way I moved on... I guess. You might think that, yes la, talk of course easy, it's not easy to do it. I couldn't say I don't agree with it, I used to say that too. But when you finally did it, you'll feel, it's really that easy to let it go and move on.
My Gu Zheng teacher was telling me this the other day: I thought you are the kind of people who would give up easily, I never thought you'll keep learning until now. Turns out you are really good, you are potential. You will be really great if you spend more time on practicing. & you let things go fast, you wouldn't keep it in your heart and sad over it for very long time.
I'm flattered, it's a very big compliment for me. I don't know why people always think I am the kind who will give up easily. Perhaps because I am petite and I looked like a overly protected girl. But hey, I am stronger than you think I am! :) You'll be amazed by how capable I can be, don't underestimate me ;)
Till then,
xx
❄
